Mariied but dating

The love of your life just might be a married man." Being part of any couple can be challenging and unpredictable, as we all know.But when the man with whom you're involved is part of another couple, someone else's husband, then the challenge and unpredictability can make your life a messy, unhappy waiting game that you will rarely win.What that means in a three-way relationship is that each day is securely connected.A floppy relationship triangle exists when the man in question is at the apex of that triangle and the two women are represented by the other two points.The woman who is in love with a married man lives a life that, for the most part, is shrouded in secrecy.

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She is alone most of the time and spends it waiting: waiting for her married lover to call, to come meet her, to share some precious time together.

She is not his wife, she is not mother to his children, she is not his parents' daughter-in-law.

She will attend to her kids and be by her husband's side for social gatherings even if it means leaving you in a lurch.

Perhaps the best advice you can give someone about having a relationship with a married man is telling her not to even start. As my friend Jenna* told me, "You can't help who you fall in love with.

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  1. Each Sunday, The Herald-Mail runs "A Life Remembered." Each story in this continuing series takes a look back — through the eyes of family, friends, co-workers and others — at a member of the community who died recently.

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